Chiggers Explained

   Ok, so I'm sorry I mentioned it. Have you ever tried to explain "chiggers" to a Yankee? The conversation went a little something like this:

Yank: "Amber, I just read your totally awesome blog! It's really fantastic! You're so cool, I wish I could be like you!" (I . . . may have embellished here and there, but hang w/ me)
Me: "Why, thank you!"
Yank: "But I've just got one question - what the heck is a chigger?"
Me: "Well, firstly it's chiggers - I mean I don't think you can have just one. . .and they are bugs we have here in the South"
Yank: "O yeah, so what are they? They're humongous, right?"
Me: "Well, no. They're tiny red bugs. They make you itch, they make you itch like crazy."
Yank: "O, so like a mosquito? "
Me: "Nooo, not like a mosquito. They don't really bite. They infest themselves in the skin."
Yank: "Do what?"
Me: "They are these tiny, tiny little red bugs that get on you from the grass or the woods, all over really, and they crawl into your skin and lay their eggs. Itches like crazy."
Yank: "You mean you have bugs that crawl under you skin and lay eggs in you!?!?"
Me: "Yeah, that pretty much sums it up."
Yank: "I think I'm gonna be sick . . . "