Conker: Backwards Evolution

   I'm not going to make any qualms about it: my dogs are heathens.  I am probably the worst dog owner ever.  Ok probably not ever, I mean I have seen that heartbreaking show Animal Cops on Animal Planet, but lets just say my dogs are spoiled to the point of rotten.  The discipline they do have is a little iffy at best.  Of course Chiquita is well behaved (I think that goes w/out saying).  They can follow simple commands easily enough: sit, come, lay down, get down.  (Notice how 'stay' was not included on that list as this command has completely eluded them!)  That being said Conker can only sit, and usually only if there is a treat involved. 
   When I tried to teach the little mongrel how to lay down he wasn't having it.  I tried a couple of times putting the treat very close to him on the ground saying the command as this worked for the other two.  In their excitement to get the treat they would flop to the ground.  Conker not so much.  So, then I tried a couple of times to show him what I wanted by putting him in the laying position: hah!  You would've thought I was strapping him to a nuclear weapon aimed at evil space aliens the way he contorted his body so as not to lay on the floor!  Then I tried to command, sweep the front legs, and quickly reward.  I have to say the little devil learned very quickly: he learned after the FIRST time that when I say 'Lay Down' I am going to sweep his front legs so he had better get out of the way.  So, now as you've probably guessed for Conker the command 'Lay Down' simply means 'Back up Really Quick!' 
   So, now even years later I can have all my little doggies lined up in a row and give the command, "Lay Down" and Gumbo and Chiquita will flop to the floor w/ lightening speed and Conker takes three fast little steps backwards: sigh.

Conker layin on the couch w/ Jamie